A Reality Check
Do a reality check on your relationships: ask yourself these two questions:
1. Is it my partner's job to give me love, approval, and appreciation? 2. Is it my job to manipulate my partner into giving them to me?
I know it can seem pretty ridiculous - as if your partner's only purpose is to make you happy...and your only purpose is to make sure they do it to your liking... Now you might be shaking your head in disagreement thinking, "Nope, not me - I don't see it that way." And if you are - good! I love that you're questioning the validity of what I'm sharing with you. And I also invite you to answer these two questions: - Have you ever been disappointed with your partner? - Have you ever said yes to your partner or compromised when you didn't really want to? If you answered yes, here's a bit of a reality check - do you see yourself and your partner as full time employees in those jobs?
Maybe it's time to find your true role within your relationship. Most people spend so much time trying to get their partner to give them love, approval, and appreciation that they actually neglect themselves. After all, if you're over there living your partner's life trying to get them to love, approve of, and appreciate you - there's no one here to take care of you, right? And even the activities that *seem* to be things that you're doing for yourself aren't actually for you because they're all being done with the motive to get your partner to dish out the love, approval, and appreciation.
Manipulation Disguised as Self-Care. There are 2 ways to do anything: with stress or with peace. You could also look at like this: one way to do it is with a motive to get love, appreciation and appreciation, (stressful) and the other is without the motive (peaceful).
Mona Grayson
1. Is it my partner's job to give me love, approval, and appreciation? 2. Is it my job to manipulate my partner into giving them to me?
I know it can seem pretty ridiculous - as if your partner's only purpose is to make you happy...and your only purpose is to make sure they do it to your liking... Now you might be shaking your head in disagreement thinking, "Nope, not me - I don't see it that way." And if you are - good! I love that you're questioning the validity of what I'm sharing with you. And I also invite you to answer these two questions: - Have you ever been disappointed with your partner? - Have you ever said yes to your partner or compromised when you didn't really want to? If you answered yes, here's a bit of a reality check - do you see yourself and your partner as full time employees in those jobs?
Maybe it's time to find your true role within your relationship. Most people spend so much time trying to get their partner to give them love, approval, and appreciation that they actually neglect themselves. After all, if you're over there living your partner's life trying to get them to love, approve of, and appreciate you - there's no one here to take care of you, right? And even the activities that *seem* to be things that you're doing for yourself aren't actually for you because they're all being done with the motive to get your partner to dish out the love, approval, and appreciation.
Manipulation Disguised as Self-Care. There are 2 ways to do anything: with stress or with peace. You could also look at like this: one way to do it is with a motive to get love, appreciation and appreciation, (stressful) and the other is without the motive (peaceful).
Mona Grayson
posted by Dr. Joe at 5:33 AM
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